Aug. 19, 2024
Saying No with Grace: Elevate Your Business Success and Personal Well-being
What if learning to say no could actually skyrocket your business success and personal well-being? Join us on Modern Leadership as we unpack the power of saying no with grace and precision, an invaluable skill for any entrepreneur. Discover how understanding the current season of your business can transform your decision-making, helping you to identify and prioritize opportunities that truly align with your goals. We'll share practical steps and mindset shifts that will enable you to set boundaries and protect your most valuable resources—your time and energy.
In this episode, we offer actionable strategies for saying no without burning bridges, preserving your relationships while staying true to your priorities. Through personal anecdotes and proven tactics, you'll learn how to communicate your limitations constructively, ensuring you give your best to the commitments that matter most. Whether you're at the beginning of your entrepreneurial journey or looking to scale, this conversation is filled with insights to help you make smarter choices and maintain your enthusiasm for the things that drive your success. Tune in and learn how to turn down the good to make room for the great!
Are you looking for a way to grow exponentially, without having to add more things to you're already over-packed to-do list? If so, grab a free spot on an upcoming training where we are going to teach the 3 things you need to have to Unlock Rapid Growth in Business, Family, and Health (All at Once)! Sign up at https://www.modernleadership.us/podcastworkshop
Transcript
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It's time to redefine leadership.
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Welcome to Modern Leadership, where we see things differently.
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Our podcast is all about empowering entrepreneurs like you to achieve the next level of success in business and life.
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We believe that you can create a massive impact in the world without compromising your personal life or family time to do so.
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We're committed to providing you with actionable tips and strategies weekly to make that possible.
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So if you're ready to become a modern leader and make a lasting difference in the world, consider subscribing, turn on notifications and dive into our community.
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We want to thank you for being here, because the world needs your leadership now more than ever.
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Let's go.
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So how did you learn how to say no nicely?
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Yeah, it actually took some time.
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I wasn't really good at saying no in the beginning and sometimes, when I did say no, it kind of was a way of burning bridges as opposed to getting them to see that it just wasn't something that was in the cards.
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We get asked a lot like how do we say no to things?
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And really it's about having a filter right.
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It's figuring out what to say no to so that you have the available time, energy and space to say yes to the things that really are going to move the needle.
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Now here's what I have to say.
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Like, before we actually get into how we do this, I want to let you know that we all have different seasons that we're in.
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If you're just starting your business, you may have to say yes a lot more than you say no, but as you continue to grow and climb and develop new skills and also earn more income, you're going to be helping a lot more people, which means you have to get better at saying no to the good so you can say yes to the great.
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That's what we want to help you do today, and we're going to talk about doing it in three simple steps.
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So let's dive into first, the mindset around learning how to say no.
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Now, for us, when we made the transition between $40,000 a year to $100,000 a year, to $400,000 a year, we had to have a different filter to be able to run things through to decide if it was gonna be a yes or a no.
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So the first step when it comes to the mindset piece of this is what season are you in Now?
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You have to be really truthful with yourself, and I would encourage you to talk to someone else about this, maybe somebody else who's a few steps ahead of you Because sometimes you think you are at a season of yes, when in reality you're stuck because you are saying yes Because, like we said before, in order for you to be able to get to the next level, you have to learn how to say no to the good so you can say yes to the great.
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And so really asking yourself what season am I in?
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Am I in the season of just saying yes to everyone?
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If so, that's the beginning stages.
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But once you find that you've capped out your potential not only your income but your impact then we start to have to revisit this, and then we have to change the filter, and the filter might be something like if it's not a heck yes, then it's a heck no, and so I want to ask you what season of your business are you in?
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Now let's dive into the second part, which is the tactics behind it.
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So here's what I have to say about this.
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So there is a little bit of an element of people pleasing in this area, so you have to kind of think about it in this way.
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Take ownership.
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Now, when you come to a point where you do have to say no, this is what I highly encourage you to do.
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To actually make it about you, let me give an example.
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Let's say you're saying yes to everyone and somebody else comes to you and says, hey, can you do this speech or this podcast or this training?
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And you just say yes to them and you realize that you're so exhausted from saying yes to everyone that you're only showing up with about 50% of what you truly have to offer.
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You're watering yourself down.
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Now, if I were to communicate this to someone and say, hey, listen, if I'm going to show up for you, I'm going to show up for you.
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I'm going to be giving you 100%.
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Unfortunately, because I have all of these other things that I've said yes to, I cannot offer that today.
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I would not want to show up for you and for your audience at 50%, because you do not deserve that.
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So I just want to say how much I appreciate you for asking me, but right now I'm going to have to decline, knowing that sometime in the future this might be a possibility.
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Now, just take that into consideration when you're trying to communicate it, because if you're just saying a plain no.
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I mean, if you decide to do that, that's okay.
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I like to give a little bit more insights, because then I'm not just like blanket saying no, this isn't for me.
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It's more of a I want to serve you on the best level and I can't do that right now.
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I'm choosing to say no so that I can say yes to the things and be 100% present.
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When I do and when you lean with that, there's going to be some people who are going to be upset anyway.
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There's really nothing you can do about that.
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The only thing that you can do is show up as the best version of you and by communicating this way, I've even done this in an overtime instance where people are calling me to work overtime at LAPD.
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In the same way, getting them to see that I can only show up at 50 or 75% of my capacity, the person is usually thankful because they know that I truly want to be the best that I can be and I just can't do that for them right then.
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Yeah, and I've heard some people actually say that you can say no without any explanation.
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Now, that's an approach that you can take, but that's not what we're talking about today.
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Our video is how to say it nicely and not to say that like we're going into the people pleasing realm.
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It's just that you know you would want to be communicated that way as well.
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If someone had to say no to you, you would want to get that information.
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The way that Mark explained it Like that feels good.
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It's also just a better way to communicate with other people.
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So even when you actually communicate this way and say things the way that Mark said it, like, it makes you feel good because of the way that you're showing up for the clients that you say yes to, okay.
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So how do you actually get yourself to actually hold yourself to that standard?
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Yeah, that's.
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That's actually the hard part of boundaries, right, the first part of setting boundaries.
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It does take a little bit of required time and energy, and sometimes you communicating it to the other person, but the hard part is following up, is actually staying true to that thing.
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Now, what I have personally found is either I get a mentor or an accountability partner, somebody that's on the same page as me a lot of times it's you so that I can verbalize to you of like, this is what my filter is.
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Please hold me to it, because the truth is we know you want to say yes to everything because you want to show up in the world, because the world needs you right now.
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What you have to offer is incredibly powerful.
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It's just that when we say yes to everyone, basically we're saying no to everyone because we're not showing up as the best versions of us.
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So we know where your heart is.
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You want to make a huge impact and you're going to make a huge impact when you start to get more familiar with the word no, so that when you do say yes, you over deliver only the way that you can.
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So thank you for being willing to fight that fight and if you enjoy this type of content, definitely subscribe and especially make our weekend workshops where we dive deeper into topics just like this.
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Thank you for what you do out there every single day and keep leading from the front.
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